Everyone is feeling it, it's an unwelcome blend of change and hypersensitivity.
There's something in the air, some sort of cosmic shift that I don't really know how to explain. If I had to try articulate it, I would explain it it as the end of the old and the start of a brand new being for each of us.
While in the shift you'll experience moments of deep introspection, heightened awareness and for some (particularly me) a great sense of discomfort on all levels - physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally.
In short, I've been feeling lost. That's all. Questioning everything, questioning friendships, life purpose, seeing things in a totally different light. A definite repulsion for all things ego driven. Negative people, gossip, drama. The petty things drain my already agitated soul. Over the last few months the most important person in my life is, wait for it, me. Somehow I forgot this, not consciously but because somehow life has gotten the best of me. I'd forgotten that without looking out for myself, no one else would and I burnt out as fast as I was ignited with the desire to help others before myself.
I had to get lost before I could find myself
It happened slowly, then suddenly all at once. I started to notice the glow had turned into a dull reflection in the mirror and apathy was my attitude toward all things that made me smile and shine from the inside out months before. It's almost as if my body was walking on this earthly domain and my soul had simply left me to exist all by myself. I could feel the separation. My Angels that had always seemed arms length away were now distant memories until I was recently reminded that it was in fact me who left them when I chose to put everything else before my own spiritual and emotional responsiblities. I have work to do to catch up to my old new self, the shift has reminded me of this.
I think I cried for a full day last Sunday, a purge of emotions from as far as 15 years back. Emotions and issues I honestly thought I had dealt with but the shift will do that to you.
The shift will cause you to suddenly question everything you thought you knew about your life and where you're going. I sat in a pile, I was blaming the whole world for my list of excruciating circumstances, memories and people that I had to deal with. "How the hell did I get here?", I sobbed. I had lost myself and I didn't even realise it.
Don't resist, just let it happen
I called my parents on two separate occasions this week, both times about the same problem's I've been dealing with. Just this afternoon both of these people, separate from each other for the last 20 plus years gave me the same advice. A golden thread of clarity hit home inside me, both of them sharing the same simple gems that have put everything into luminous perspective. "Go with the flow of life, let go of the need to control everything that you can't understand/fix/comprehend."
Here comes the pearler
"I just wish I had a break, when is it my turn to just live my life and get ahead", I sobbed. To which both parents echoed - "Make your own break, make the change you want to see, create the life you want to live."
(Insert facepalm here) You hear these snippets 1000 times in life and suddenly it's all relevant. Create.The.Life.You.Desire. Hashtag are you feeling me?
So I'm back from the dead, back from the cesspool of self pity and loathing to bring you more blogging awesomeness, love, light and authenticity. Just know that no matter what you're going through, the shift is happening. It's not a tangible thing, it's not something you can control and it's not something you should fear. No matter where you are, if you're reading this and you're feeling the shift you're not alone, we'll go through it together.
If you're in the same boat don't panic, it just means you're that much closer to a breakthrough than you realise!
Showing posts with label life purpose. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life purpose. Show all posts
Monday, 30 March 2015
Sunday, 13 July 2014
The truth about life's lessons
Awareness sets you free. It's the difference between life happening to you versus for you - to learn from and by.
The last 2 weeks find me somewhere between limbo and and abyss of emotions, my awareness of every moment, constantly teaching me new things.
What you haven't seen on my Facebook
If you follow my posts, you'll know that I'm going through a bit of a life changing period. Today was hard.
I sat in the car outside Builders Warehouse sobbing. It's been the first real moment of manifested misery and frustration since our breakup. I had invested 5 years into him, 5 years into us. Why did I feel like such a failure, as if I could have done more. I lick my deep wounds.
Last night, my mother (whose going through her own lessons) Skyped me in frustration as she prepared for another wedding. She's a talented and dedicated floral artist and decor designer that was simply having a bad day. A series of mishaps with her planning and flower arrangements has left her feeling defeated and deflated. It's not the bigger picture and it's not the norm, but it is life. Life with it's mixture of up's and down's and unforeseen blessings.
She continued to explain how her major arrangement had accidentally been smashed and how she would have to do it all over again. Seeing the glass half full I comforted her with, "Perhaps the Universe, knowing how much you love doing what you do, has given you a second chance to do the same thing with as much love and passion as always - can you find that passion again while feeling the way you do?" I was trying to illustrate that life doesn't happen on our terms, if you love something as much as my mother loves her floral artistry, the Universe will give you an opportunity to prove your unconditional dedication but the final outcome depends on your attitude in the face of adversity.
With fists in the air we shared our emotional dilemma's for the day and then laughed it off as we do when we're together. "It's one of life's lessons" I explain to her, "how badly do you want to keep doing what you love?" Her facial expression was clearly less than approving. We expect things to go smoothly 24/7 and when it doesn't we take it personally, as if life is happening to us.
Today was a tough one. I sat crying in the car, crying on the way home on the phone to a man that has been sent into my life as a friend, but is actually the loudest and clearest voice of reason I know. He consoles me, listens and advises until I've turned off my car and I'm sitting in the carport at my new home. "It just doesn't seem fair", I petition. "Why is this happening?"
My voice of reason replies, "It's just one of life's lessons, you take the good days with the bad but it's not all doom and gloom", he assures me. By now my dialogue includes "It's a bloody stupid lesson if you ask me! 5 years - gone!" I leave my vehicle wounded and proceed to my flat where my cat waits to greet me. We had it all, and here I am living in someone else's back yard in a flat, with a cat and lots of tea. I've become the stereotype of the single woman in her 30's and this wasn't my plan.
We don't stop learning
I may as well have pressed a panic button (and later that afternoon I had by accident) to let my spiritual network know that I needed comfort. Then, she called me. She being a friend that has more wisdom than I do years of my life yet in the same breath is also still learning.
"You're upset", she observes, "I'm coming over". This is the part when I pushed the panic button instead of the gate opening button and in a funny and ironic way, as if a Freudian slip of the finger, I realised I wasn't in fact, okay. For the first time since we've parted I was breaking down, it was sinking in and the strength I had pulled out of nowhere had dissolved. Miserable with flu, exhausted on all levels, I was done.
As she walks through the gate to my courtyard, her outstretched arms embrace me and I cry, a lot. Between tears, gasps and snot I cry tears of lost love, disappointment and anger - lots of anger. I cry now as I type this, this wasn't how it was meant to be in my mind and on my terms.
As the tears stream down my face and meet with her shoulder, she strokes the back of my head, she may as well have been stroking my soul. Human contact, or lack thereof, is the downside of being single. She responds with the best advice she has, "It's one of life's lessons". I'm kinda getting sick of hearing that pain, suffering and misguidance is okay, but it is.
Follow the leader
I had arranged a breakfast meeting in my snotty stage of influenza with a friend, a young aspiring make up artist looking for answers and greatly jaded by her life experiences to date. I see the beauty in her, the light and the joy - she has forgotten any of it exists within.
As she pours out her heart to me about her recent break up, and her struggles at the tender age of 23, I find myself dishing back the same insight. "It's one of life's lessons". Has this phrase become a cliched response to our personal low points, or is there some truth behind it? I know she's going to be okay, I know that this is just a phase, therefore it must be one of life's lessons. A lesson that she's either going to grow from or 'die' inside because of. The choice is hers and I can't decide it for her.
I return home and plop into bed, it's 4pm and I don't care. I'm going through my own 'stuff' and I could sleep forever. The depression has hit me and then the voice inside my head starts analyzing the 'life lesson' theory.
So, you want to know the truth?
If you're battling to accept the divorce application you've been resisting for 3 years or the retrenchment you're facing. If you can't deal with the death of a loved one and find yourself questioning the meaning of life and the days of grey skies and thunderstorms. If you're wondering why life is 'unfair' or 'cruel' and why we have to go through these uncomfortable periods of relearning and regrowing - it's because it is in fact, part of life's lessons.
As spiritual beings having a human experience, our lessons in this life include the good and the bad. After the rain, there is always growth. It presents us with constant opportunities of putting our best foot forward when we're actually feeling less than positive, less than happy and maybe even the lowest of the low. It's about continually seeking out the hidden meanings behind the things that occur and those opportunities will keep occurring until the day we die. The alternative to embracing change and hurt, is being a victim of our circumstances. The alternative is a road on which I have long since decided to get off. Life is good, it is sweet and bitter and crazy.
I thought about the love I have for my cat Tiger. Holding him up to my face I find myself cooing, "You love your mother, don't you!". His affections for me fast forward me to a future me whereby my own children are going to make me feel vulnerable and open to hurt. They are going to disappoint and they are going to be part of other personal hurts and challenges I have to face, why, because it's part of life's lessons.
The sooner you realise that days like these are temporary but they will return, the less pressure we put on ourselves to be okay, all the time! There may not be a constant state of joy, but there can be a lesson learned in each sad and stormy day that helps us be the best version of ourselves we can be.
Like love, joy and peace, there will be days of rain and even thunderstorms. The difference between the two is in accepting that they are both here to help us learn - about us, about others and about our life purpose.
Never stop growing. Life is beautiful and the Universe is conspiring to help you achieve all things that serve your greater good. Don't stop believing in the goodness and joy in this world that will return. It's just life's lessons, it's not forever and it's not here to keep you where you are. Use your pain as a compass, find faith in your Higher power and tomorrow the sun will shine again!
The last 2 weeks find me somewhere between limbo and and abyss of emotions, my awareness of every moment, constantly teaching me new things.
What you haven't seen on my Facebook
If you follow my posts, you'll know that I'm going through a bit of a life changing period. Today was hard.
I sat in the car outside Builders Warehouse sobbing. It's been the first real moment of manifested misery and frustration since our breakup. I had invested 5 years into him, 5 years into us. Why did I feel like such a failure, as if I could have done more. I lick my deep wounds.
Last night, my mother (whose going through her own lessons) Skyped me in frustration as she prepared for another wedding. She's a talented and dedicated floral artist and decor designer that was simply having a bad day. A series of mishaps with her planning and flower arrangements has left her feeling defeated and deflated. It's not the bigger picture and it's not the norm, but it is life. Life with it's mixture of up's and down's and unforeseen blessings.
She continued to explain how her major arrangement had accidentally been smashed and how she would have to do it all over again. Seeing the glass half full I comforted her with, "Perhaps the Universe, knowing how much you love doing what you do, has given you a second chance to do the same thing with as much love and passion as always - can you find that passion again while feeling the way you do?" I was trying to illustrate that life doesn't happen on our terms, if you love something as much as my mother loves her floral artistry, the Universe will give you an opportunity to prove your unconditional dedication but the final outcome depends on your attitude in the face of adversity.
With fists in the air we shared our emotional dilemma's for the day and then laughed it off as we do when we're together. "It's one of life's lessons" I explain to her, "how badly do you want to keep doing what you love?" Her facial expression was clearly less than approving. We expect things to go smoothly 24/7 and when it doesn't we take it personally, as if life is happening to us.
Today was a tough one. I sat crying in the car, crying on the way home on the phone to a man that has been sent into my life as a friend, but is actually the loudest and clearest voice of reason I know. He consoles me, listens and advises until I've turned off my car and I'm sitting in the carport at my new home. "It just doesn't seem fair", I petition. "Why is this happening?"
My voice of reason replies, "It's just one of life's lessons, you take the good days with the bad but it's not all doom and gloom", he assures me. By now my dialogue includes "It's a bloody stupid lesson if you ask me! 5 years - gone!" I leave my vehicle wounded and proceed to my flat where my cat waits to greet me. We had it all, and here I am living in someone else's back yard in a flat, with a cat and lots of tea. I've become the stereotype of the single woman in her 30's and this wasn't my plan.
We don't stop learning
I may as well have pressed a panic button (and later that afternoon I had by accident) to let my spiritual network know that I needed comfort. Then, she called me. She being a friend that has more wisdom than I do years of my life yet in the same breath is also still learning.
"You're upset", she observes, "I'm coming over". This is the part when I pushed the panic button instead of the gate opening button and in a funny and ironic way, as if a Freudian slip of the finger, I realised I wasn't in fact, okay. For the first time since we've parted I was breaking down, it was sinking in and the strength I had pulled out of nowhere had dissolved. Miserable with flu, exhausted on all levels, I was done.
As she walks through the gate to my courtyard, her outstretched arms embrace me and I cry, a lot. Between tears, gasps and snot I cry tears of lost love, disappointment and anger - lots of anger. I cry now as I type this, this wasn't how it was meant to be in my mind and on my terms.
As the tears stream down my face and meet with her shoulder, she strokes the back of my head, she may as well have been stroking my soul. Human contact, or lack thereof, is the downside of being single. She responds with the best advice she has, "It's one of life's lessons". I'm kinda getting sick of hearing that pain, suffering and misguidance is okay, but it is.
Follow the leader
I had arranged a breakfast meeting in my snotty stage of influenza with a friend, a young aspiring make up artist looking for answers and greatly jaded by her life experiences to date. I see the beauty in her, the light and the joy - she has forgotten any of it exists within.
As she pours out her heart to me about her recent break up, and her struggles at the tender age of 23, I find myself dishing back the same insight. "It's one of life's lessons". Has this phrase become a cliched response to our personal low points, or is there some truth behind it? I know she's going to be okay, I know that this is just a phase, therefore it must be one of life's lessons. A lesson that she's either going to grow from or 'die' inside because of. The choice is hers and I can't decide it for her.
I return home and plop into bed, it's 4pm and I don't care. I'm going through my own 'stuff' and I could sleep forever. The depression has hit me and then the voice inside my head starts analyzing the 'life lesson' theory.
So, you want to know the truth?
If you're battling to accept the divorce application you've been resisting for 3 years or the retrenchment you're facing. If you can't deal with the death of a loved one and find yourself questioning the meaning of life and the days of grey skies and thunderstorms. If you're wondering why life is 'unfair' or 'cruel' and why we have to go through these uncomfortable periods of relearning and regrowing - it's because it is in fact, part of life's lessons.
As spiritual beings having a human experience, our lessons in this life include the good and the bad. After the rain, there is always growth. It presents us with constant opportunities of putting our best foot forward when we're actually feeling less than positive, less than happy and maybe even the lowest of the low. It's about continually seeking out the hidden meanings behind the things that occur and those opportunities will keep occurring until the day we die. The alternative to embracing change and hurt, is being a victim of our circumstances. The alternative is a road on which I have long since decided to get off. Life is good, it is sweet and bitter and crazy.
I thought about the love I have for my cat Tiger. Holding him up to my face I find myself cooing, "You love your mother, don't you!". His affections for me fast forward me to a future me whereby my own children are going to make me feel vulnerable and open to hurt. They are going to disappoint and they are going to be part of other personal hurts and challenges I have to face, why, because it's part of life's lessons.
The sooner you realise that days like these are temporary but they will return, the less pressure we put on ourselves to be okay, all the time! There may not be a constant state of joy, but there can be a lesson learned in each sad and stormy day that helps us be the best version of ourselves we can be.
Like love, joy and peace, there will be days of rain and even thunderstorms. The difference between the two is in accepting that they are both here to help us learn - about us, about others and about our life purpose.
Never stop growing. Life is beautiful and the Universe is conspiring to help you achieve all things that serve your greater good. Don't stop believing in the goodness and joy in this world that will return. It's just life's lessons, it's not forever and it's not here to keep you where you are. Use your pain as a compass, find faith in your Higher power and tomorrow the sun will shine again!
Toothache - a reminder to count your blessings.
Remember I told you that life was about remembering and forgetting?
Well if you didn't read that post, today was about remembering.
I sat in the waiting room for the doctor to call me. It's been a rough week for me, one that included moving my life (and the contents of our 5 year relationship) into my own little flatlet 8 kilometres from the place we once shared a home.
As I sat in my chair in a pile, the faces around me all seemed fixated on me simultaneously, as if I had an oblong head, large black eyes and purple fur. It could have been my disgustingly good looks, everyone aches to sniffle like a boss, and believe me, I was owning this!
Use Depression As Your Guide
Standing at the payment counter, I resentfully handed over my new credit card. It had been taken out as an emergency option to pay my unexpected deposit on my flatlet as well as the move and first months rent to get there. The swipe for the R1 200 doctors bill left me cold - and angry.
Being unwell is the tell tale sign that the Tan within, simply isn't happy. It happens to me every couple of months and of late, the gaps between ill-health and wellness have become smaller.
See, I thought I was fine and upstairs I am, but emotionally my physical ailments tell a different story. Your body is your compass, listen to it and it will guide you. As I trudge through Checkers, my heavy feet and slumped over body verify my emotional state. My soul left the building a couple of days ago, as if on vacation while I deal with life.
Face To Face With Toothless
As I blankly stare at the selection of water hose's in front of me (I think I landed up on auto-pilot at this stage) an obviously haggard and destitute young man approaches me.
My initial reaction is a cold one, I know what's going to come out of his mouth and it's going to be a sob story. While I'm the first to help a helpless and lost cause, I'm not in the mood to listen to someone's whining. I've got my own problems. No doubt he needs "R6 for a loaf of bread".
He starts rapping at me in Afrikaans, I catch fragments of familiar words I can make out between the pathetic grimace on his face. I tell him I don't have money, cash money. And then for some stupid reason I tell him I've got a card. My logic is that if he's going to bullshit me, I have a come back in the form of plastic. "Show me yours and I'll show you mine", I concoct. He's still pointing at his mouth, his teeth, his face. If you haven't gathered, my Afrikaans isn't that great.
His "recital" takes us to the medicine counter inside the store. He's apparently looking for Naeltjie olie (a Clove oil mixture you put on infected teeth, a cheap alternative to seeing a dentist) and while I'm inquiring with the pharmacist, he's being interrogated by store security behind me.
If you know me personally, you'll know that I'm pretty easy to manipulate. I have a soft spot for helping people that has been a trait since childhood (be sure to ask my mom about the time she came home from work and I had a friend, his mother and younger brother camping out in my room because they had nowhere to go) perhaps I'm just a problem solver :)
Wake Up Tan
As I stood paying for the Naeltjie olie at the counter, I resentfully handed over R40 as the pharmacist confirms that my mystery man had, in fact, visited the same counter 5 minutes before, just a few rand short of the transaction.
Why was he making this my problem? Why the hell must I pay for his stuff, I've got bigger problems, I'm not in the mood to do charity and I'm in credit card debt - again! Why couldn't I just say no, walk away and be done with it.
At this stage my patience has worn thing, again if you know me at face value, you would never be able to tell the difference between an irritated and an irate me, they look the same but feel different on the inside. I hand over the little brown bag, with an almost sarcastic 'There you go". He hails back praises of gratitude in my direction and I could have sworn he called me Tannie! (Afrikaans for auntie, usually said to older women by younger people).
My inner dialogue was something along the line of "Bet you he's gonna be drinking with the money he saved on those drops", the bitter version of myself pushed my trolley back down the aisle. Where the heck were those wall frame hooks I had been searching for? And then it hit me.
Swipe after swipe the woman at the checkout counter exchanges glances at me. "Would you like a plastic bag", she asks. She smiles gentle at me and I coax a feeble smile back in her direction. I had been so caught up in my own self pity that I had forgotten, until now, that I had just returned from a personal consultation with one of the best doctors in the country and received the best medication I could afford - because I can afford it. And yet, here's a man who cannot afford a dentist (for whatever reason he's downtrodden and out of luck) and is in need of something as inexpensive as a bottle of Naeltjie olie and I'm that neurotic, disbelieving and somewhat jaded individual feeling as if I'm being taken advantage of.
Of course in this day and age (and living in South Africa) we are constantly being taken advantage of, but regardless of the circumstances, it was a reminder to be grateful for what I had, when it felt like I had the world against me and I was "so broke".
As I leave the Checkers store the same man sits on the public bench near the exit of the store, he's eating a dry bread roll. I've just had a Wimpy burger, chips and a coke for R60. His Naeltjie olie cost me R34. I see the bigger picture.
Well if you didn't read that post, today was about remembering.
I sat in the waiting room for the doctor to call me. It's been a rough week for me, one that included moving my life (and the contents of our 5 year relationship) into my own little flatlet 8 kilometres from the place we once shared a home.
As I sat in my chair in a pile, the faces around me all seemed fixated on me simultaneously, as if I had an oblong head, large black eyes and purple fur. It could have been my disgustingly good looks, everyone aches to sniffle like a boss, and believe me, I was owning this!
Use Depression As Your Guide
Standing at the payment counter, I resentfully handed over my new credit card. It had been taken out as an emergency option to pay my unexpected deposit on my flatlet as well as the move and first months rent to get there. The swipe for the R1 200 doctors bill left me cold - and angry.
Being unwell is the tell tale sign that the Tan within, simply isn't happy. It happens to me every couple of months and of late, the gaps between ill-health and wellness have become smaller.
See, I thought I was fine and upstairs I am, but emotionally my physical ailments tell a different story. Your body is your compass, listen to it and it will guide you. As I trudge through Checkers, my heavy feet and slumped over body verify my emotional state. My soul left the building a couple of days ago, as if on vacation while I deal with life.
Face To Face With Toothless
As I blankly stare at the selection of water hose's in front of me (I think I landed up on auto-pilot at this stage) an obviously haggard and destitute young man approaches me.
My initial reaction is a cold one, I know what's going to come out of his mouth and it's going to be a sob story. While I'm the first to help a helpless and lost cause, I'm not in the mood to listen to someone's whining. I've got my own problems. No doubt he needs "R6 for a loaf of bread".
He starts rapping at me in Afrikaans, I catch fragments of familiar words I can make out between the pathetic grimace on his face. I tell him I don't have money, cash money. And then for some stupid reason I tell him I've got a card. My logic is that if he's going to bullshit me, I have a come back in the form of plastic. "Show me yours and I'll show you mine", I concoct. He's still pointing at his mouth, his teeth, his face. If you haven't gathered, my Afrikaans isn't that great.
His "recital" takes us to the medicine counter inside the store. He's apparently looking for Naeltjie olie (a Clove oil mixture you put on infected teeth, a cheap alternative to seeing a dentist) and while I'm inquiring with the pharmacist, he's being interrogated by store security behind me.
If you know me personally, you'll know that I'm pretty easy to manipulate. I have a soft spot for helping people that has been a trait since childhood (be sure to ask my mom about the time she came home from work and I had a friend, his mother and younger brother camping out in my room because they had nowhere to go) perhaps I'm just a problem solver :)
Wake Up Tan
As I stood paying for the Naeltjie olie at the counter, I resentfully handed over R40 as the pharmacist confirms that my mystery man had, in fact, visited the same counter 5 minutes before, just a few rand short of the transaction.
Why was he making this my problem? Why the hell must I pay for his stuff, I've got bigger problems, I'm not in the mood to do charity and I'm in credit card debt - again! Why couldn't I just say no, walk away and be done with it.
At this stage my patience has worn thing, again if you know me at face value, you would never be able to tell the difference between an irritated and an irate me, they look the same but feel different on the inside. I hand over the little brown bag, with an almost sarcastic 'There you go". He hails back praises of gratitude in my direction and I could have sworn he called me Tannie! (Afrikaans for auntie, usually said to older women by younger people).
My inner dialogue was something along the line of "Bet you he's gonna be drinking with the money he saved on those drops", the bitter version of myself pushed my trolley back down the aisle. Where the heck were those wall frame hooks I had been searching for? And then it hit me.
Swipe after swipe the woman at the checkout counter exchanges glances at me. "Would you like a plastic bag", she asks. She smiles gentle at me and I coax a feeble smile back in her direction. I had been so caught up in my own self pity that I had forgotten, until now, that I had just returned from a personal consultation with one of the best doctors in the country and received the best medication I could afford - because I can afford it. And yet, here's a man who cannot afford a dentist (for whatever reason he's downtrodden and out of luck) and is in need of something as inexpensive as a bottle of Naeltjie olie and I'm that neurotic, disbelieving and somewhat jaded individual feeling as if I'm being taken advantage of.
Of course in this day and age (and living in South Africa) we are constantly being taken advantage of, but regardless of the circumstances, it was a reminder to be grateful for what I had, when it felt like I had the world against me and I was "so broke".
As I leave the Checkers store the same man sits on the public bench near the exit of the store, he's eating a dry bread roll. I've just had a Wimpy burger, chips and a coke for R60. His Naeltjie olie cost me R34. I see the bigger picture.
Sunday, 22 December 2013
Christmas Stocking Filler! Roz Brickman's Reiki Course 2014
You may recall my Reiki with Roz blog post earlier in May this year.
I've just received fantastic news for those wanting to either have a Reiki session with this lovely lady (situated in Glenhove in Johannesburg) or be taught first hand by Roz on her first Reiki 1 course in January of 2014.
Roz's rates for her Reflexology or Reiki sessions are highly competitive and her first Reiki course for 2014 will be no different. Roz will be sharing her love for connecting with Angels and Universal energy and will provide relevant literature and workshop material. She is a gentle, warm woman who has so much knowledge and education behind her in the field of Energy Healing so you don't want to miss out!
As a special blog post offer she's offering readers a rate of R1 500 for her first course of 2014. Terms and conditions apply so please be sure to be in touch with Roz to find out more.
For further details and enquiries Roz is contactable on 083 601 5181 or email her Rozbrickman@gmail.com.
Terms and conditions*
Subject to availability and full payment required prior to the commencement of the course due to preparation of study materials. Restricted group of 8 people only for one on one attention.
I've just received fantastic news for those wanting to either have a Reiki session with this lovely lady (situated in Glenhove in Johannesburg) or be taught first hand by Roz on her first Reiki 1 course in January of 2014.
Roz's rates for her Reflexology or Reiki sessions are highly competitive and her first Reiki course for 2014 will be no different. Roz will be sharing her love for connecting with Angels and Universal energy and will provide relevant literature and workshop material. She is a gentle, warm woman who has so much knowledge and education behind her in the field of Energy Healing so you don't want to miss out!
As a special blog post offer she's offering readers a rate of R1 500 for her first course of 2014. Terms and conditions apply so please be sure to be in touch with Roz to find out more.
For further details and enquiries Roz is contactable on 083 601 5181 or email her Rozbrickman@gmail.com.
Terms and conditions*
Subject to availability and full payment required prior to the commencement of the course due to preparation of study materials. Restricted group of 8 people only for one on one attention.
Sunday, 25 August 2013
Don't Find Your Passion
Yesterday I was driving out my complex driveway at 06h15. Yet another weekend that I've managed to let slip through my fingers due to work committments. While I love my job and respect that working weekends comes with the territory, moaning about it is necessary - because its reminds me that I need to find what I really want to miss my weekends for.
I realised en route to the office that a box and a label for my personality would be hard to find, I am after all as unique as everyone else is. As I chat with a friend (who shares the same self discovery mission I'm on) we talk about finding ourselves and changing our lives, careers and current positions, but where to start?
Listing The Obvious
I'm sure I've blogged about this before, about the life coach I stopped going to because one single sentence she had mentioned changed my perception of my quest. "What makes you happy?" A question I haven't been able to answer, but its getting easier.
For some its easy to list ones joys. Chocolate, wine, writing, socialising with friends, animals - but we all like those things right? And then I realised I was listing the obvious, the quest to find ones passion doesn't necessarily mean listing what makes you happy, its about finding what makes you, you!
Lose The Labels
At this stage you're either with me or you're completely lost. If you're with me it probably cause you're searching too. Here's the thing, don't find your passion, find your (insert your name and add "ness" to it). Its the raw version of yourself that you've been all this time, there is no need to reinvent yourself, just see yourself from the worlds perspective looking in.
The friend I had mentioned earlier has been trying to find a label and a pigeon hole to put herself in and she feels like she's failing miserably in her quest. I have been where she is now, grasping at labels and careers to put myself in line with and follow - until now. I laugh in the face of moulds, I am one of a kind and I broke the mould when I was made!
While some people find it easy to wake up at the end of Grade 9 and say "Yes I wanna be a doctor", there are more and more people who are just not able to make one solid decision because there are so many options out there these days. Finding your (insert your name and add "ness" to it) means finding what you have innately known your whole life without even recognising it. Perhaps you're the prototype for a label of its own?
As Unique As Everyone Else
So you're reading this saying "Ok, Tan. You say I need to be myself, but how do I know what that is?". The answer involves some research and discovery. Interview people about your childhood, collate a list of those things people always say about you and you will see the pattern. My mom recently told me that I was always asking questions. A family friend confirmed that I was always busy with something, discovering new things with a manic sense of urgency. Wow, how nothings changed.
Oddly enough I only realised yesterday that I'm considered quite humourous by my friends and colleagues. I say oddly because apparently its quite obvious to everyone else and yet I scratched my head hearing this information as if someone had told me I had been adopted.
It was a shock to hear it, yes I've always known I was a clown but to be described by my peers as witty, quirky and sharp with my humour was news to me, apparently that's part of my Tanithness! Of course it is, its the one thing that people say "Oh my that's just so you". In identifying your unique attributes you'll find your passions and you'll find there aren't just a couple.
Lose Your Watch, Not Your Compass
Forget the pressures of conformity (and by this I dont mean become complacent or lazy in your quest for self improvement) and just keep exploring what you love and who you are until something fits.
Take that cooking/DIY/abseiling/scuba-diving/pottery/teaching/photography/saxaphone/animal whispering course and keep going until something makes sense enough for you to stay.
I'm realising that most of the people that feel lost or unfulfilled in their lives are those who are Highly Sensitive People with a deep love for animals, are successful at managing many smaller projects rather than one mundane role and have an obvious purpose to serve mankind.
If anything comes from this exercise, it will be a test of your ability to try something new without the fear of failure. Resilience and exploration are necessary in surviving in this crazy world.
"I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
I realised en route to the office that a box and a label for my personality would be hard to find, I am after all as unique as everyone else is. As I chat with a friend (who shares the same self discovery mission I'm on) we talk about finding ourselves and changing our lives, careers and current positions, but where to start?
Listing The Obvious
I'm sure I've blogged about this before, about the life coach I stopped going to because one single sentence she had mentioned changed my perception of my quest. "What makes you happy?" A question I haven't been able to answer, but its getting easier.
For some its easy to list ones joys. Chocolate, wine, writing, socialising with friends, animals - but we all like those things right? And then I realised I was listing the obvious, the quest to find ones passion doesn't necessarily mean listing what makes you happy, its about finding what makes you, you!
Lose The Labels
At this stage you're either with me or you're completely lost. If you're with me it probably cause you're searching too. Here's the thing, don't find your passion, find your (insert your name and add "ness" to it). Its the raw version of yourself that you've been all this time, there is no need to reinvent yourself, just see yourself from the worlds perspective looking in.
The friend I had mentioned earlier has been trying to find a label and a pigeon hole to put herself in and she feels like she's failing miserably in her quest. I have been where she is now, grasping at labels and careers to put myself in line with and follow - until now. I laugh in the face of moulds, I am one of a kind and I broke the mould when I was made!
While some people find it easy to wake up at the end of Grade 9 and say "Yes I wanna be a doctor", there are more and more people who are just not able to make one solid decision because there are so many options out there these days. Finding your (insert your name and add "ness" to it) means finding what you have innately known your whole life without even recognising it. Perhaps you're the prototype for a label of its own?
As Unique As Everyone Else
So you're reading this saying "Ok, Tan. You say I need to be myself, but how do I know what that is?". The answer involves some research and discovery. Interview people about your childhood, collate a list of those things people always say about you and you will see the pattern. My mom recently told me that I was always asking questions. A family friend confirmed that I was always busy with something, discovering new things with a manic sense of urgency. Wow, how nothings changed.
Oddly enough I only realised yesterday that I'm considered quite humourous by my friends and colleagues. I say oddly because apparently its quite obvious to everyone else and yet I scratched my head hearing this information as if someone had told me I had been adopted.
It was a shock to hear it, yes I've always known I was a clown but to be described by my peers as witty, quirky and sharp with my humour was news to me, apparently that's part of my Tanithness! Of course it is, its the one thing that people say "Oh my that's just so you". In identifying your unique attributes you'll find your passions and you'll find there aren't just a couple.
Lose Your Watch, Not Your Compass
Forget the pressures of conformity (and by this I dont mean become complacent or lazy in your quest for self improvement) and just keep exploring what you love and who you are until something fits.
Take that cooking/DIY/abseiling/scuba-diving/pottery/teaching/photography/saxaphone/animal whispering course and keep going until something makes sense enough for you to stay.
I'm realising that most of the people that feel lost or unfulfilled in their lives are those who are Highly Sensitive People with a deep love for animals, are successful at managing many smaller projects rather than one mundane role and have an obvious purpose to serve mankind.
If anything comes from this exercise, it will be a test of your ability to try something new without the fear of failure. Resilience and exploration are necessary in surviving in this crazy world.
"I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
Sunday, 18 August 2013
10 Signs Its Time To Let Go
The biggest challenge when making a decision is our constant fear of making the wrong choice. Thing is its not the end of the world, its simply a choice. There is no right or wrong, its just a decision to be made with its own set of consequences.
I am however the worst person when it comes to making a clean break if the non-negotiables aren't clear. I'm not stating these 10 signs are hard fact nor am I claiming that they apply to your love life or a particular scenario, every person and circumstance is different, but these are my tell tale signs that something is amiss.
So I'm here to break it down for myself - and for you - if the decision still needs to be made then consider this.
10 Signs Its Time To Let Go
- The passion is gone. The ship has sailed and you just don't feel the "romance" any more. Perhaps your burning desire has dissipated into more of a slow simmer but its just not enough to make the effort for.
- You've seen yourself elsewhere. Your imagination keeps showing you an alternative scenario, eternally optimistic in your fantasy world. You've already considered these alternatives and the present moment just leaves you cold in comparison.
- People start noticing the change in your attitude. There is a clear shift from bubbling enthusiasm to the dull, hum drum approach you've taken on without even realising it.
- Your inner voice is louder than ever. I'm not just talking about the voices in your head, but the voice in your heart that just keeps pulling at your shoulder, nagging you to take notice. You'll know when its time when that voice gets louder than your doubts and fears.
- You've put aside your personal goals. Perhaps you've forgotten about yourself, neglected your health/talents/family/friends/grooming. If you're not living in balance, you're probably overdoing it on the committment front to something that doesn't serve you any longer.
- You can actually see yourself in an out of body, almost comedic type of scenario and the person you're telling to F-off is probably someone important.
- Asking why. One of my most favourite alarm bells. "Why am I putting myself through this?" or "Why am I sacrificing so much." "When did I manage to lose myself?" These questions are being asked for a reason and that is because a conscious decision needs to be made.
- Possibilities and opportunities for future development aren't clear anymore. The vision you have for your future isn't going to manifest itself under the current circumstances - its time for change.
- Its in your dreams and you know it. You've woken up from nightmares, your subconscious isn't just talking to you, its shouting!
- You decide you deserve better and you don't have to feel like a victim to do so. You feel ok with this decision and you have a sense that everything is going to work out regardless of the circumstances.
My personal goal for 2013 was not to act like a victim. If you dont like something or you feel it doesn't serve your or isn't for your greater good - then change it!
Time to move on - might as well do so fearlessly.
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