Letter from the 42 year old me

Dearest little Tan (and I say little in the least condescending of ways!)

I just wanted to fill you in on a couple of things, you've contacted me for a reason and I've been holding back for SO long I don't even know where to start. 

You can go back and give advice to your younger self but I know you need advice from your older self and here I am. 

There are a couple things I need to bring to your attention. 32 can be confusing, especially where you're at right now - somewhere between juggling a career and wanting to begin your own family unit. Truth is that at 42, all is as it should be and life my sweet Tanie, is perfect in its imperfection.

Facts of life

No matter what you think you're dealing with now, it won't affect the awesomeness of your life. There is no 'end' the the discovering you will do. You will learn about yourself more and more each day, I know you've started accepting the you, you really are. Self awareness brings us all closer together.

You will love hard, passionately and be loved equally in return. Your fears about your future are valid but they aren't necessarily true. Remember that while you're trying to build your life, the inevitable is unfolding - and there's nothing you can do about change. So just relax and go with the flow of the Universe, 42 is younger than you believe. 

You will be a mom and all will unfold as it's meant to. This period of concern and discomfort that you're feeling is simply another growth spurt in your your life. You have always been (and continue at 42) growing, learning and experiencing life to the fullest. 

Your authenticity is your secret weapon

I'm not talking physical beauty Tanie, I'm talking about the light that shines from within. The same light that some care to see fade out into the darkness, but the key is to shine brighter than ever in the face of adversity. You are resilient, you are undefeated. 

When you feel like there is no light within, find inspiration. Write, dream, surround yourself with those who love you (and there are many). For it is within those creative, loving and genuinely happy moments that you find your inner muse and rekindle that unique glow. 

Do not fear for the unknown, the fun is in the discovery!

I would be lying if I said you weren't grayer, if I said your facial lines hadn't deepened the those irritating neck rings had miraculously disappeared. In 10 years a whole lot can change, look how far you've come since you were 22!

You can choose to write, to travel, to stay single or marry - there is no lack of support from the Universe. Tap into the unlimited potential that is you. Release those who drain you of energy and deplete your soul of joy - life is indeed too short to compromise on those not willing to see their own beauty, let alone yours. 

Some will judge you, most will misunderstand you, but many will love and support you through this journey. Do not fear, release the need to control and embrace being who you are right now. There is no need to grow up prematurely so stop living as if your life is about to end. The state of urgency by which you live is exhausting you, breathe. 

The hidden gems

If I had to send you a map of your life, the outcomes of the decisions you've made and the spoilers, you would indeed be desperately bored for the next 10 years. Remember that the hidden gems are in the journey, the path is littered with treasures if you're willing to see them on your way. Look up, not down, the gems lie within the clouds of change and the glory on the horizon disguised as a blinding sun. Stare long enough at the stars to keep you dreaming, and then long enough at the ground to keep moving. Whatever you do, whether you stop to take a break, sit under a tree for a rest or play alongside the river banks, never forget that every path is the right one. 

Trust in the inevitable flow of the Universe. I realise that trust is hard for you, but it gets easier the more you practice faith and free will. Dream.

So precious soul, regardless of where you are on the timeline of your life, 42 is waiting patiently, eventually, and sooner than you think. Live life to the fullest and don't be afraid to take risks. You are lovable. You are worthy. You are great. 

Until then - take a chill pill. Keep your eyes open to the beauty around you. Remain humble. Take more photographs. Stop making excuses. Stop fearing your own greatness. Life is a precious gift that very few are privileged enough to experience till old age. Smile. Laugh. Give more of yourself. Protect your heart, and be content in your love.

In the end, we all return to perfection so enjoy the human journey and the joy of being uniquely you!